I know I'm late on this. But gosh darnit this broad can sing. And I really am always dragging that horse around...."Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground."
So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart
I will tell you, 2011 has definitely been the best year of my life so far. And I have to say that. I feel almost contractually obliged to recognize every compilation of moments in which I breathe and continue to breathe as the best moments and group of moments of my life.
But seriously, considering the circumstances: nearly getting arrested for scratching up some 20 year old bird, getting thrown out of my sweet ass apartment because I scratched up said bird, and because two roommates threatened to move out because of me (really? really.), quitting a really good-paying job (that I had IN THE BAG) to write (!), almost losing new apartment because of dishonest new roommate, saving apartment, getting new job, quitting new job (again, to write (!!)), sort of falling in love and feeling like I wanted to get married and have babies (phew! dodged that bullet!) and finally landing in some place pretty closely resembling peace. It's all turned out pretty well.
Things that used to eat me - aforementioned bird upon whom I scratched, aforementioned dishonest roommate, aforementioned previous roommates' imagined betrayal of and turning on me - don't bother me at all now. It's surprising and not that surprising that when I stopped focusing on my own anger, hurt, and inflated emotional bruising, and shifted my attention to my goals and passions, and shared my time with people who respected me and valued my contribution to their lives suddenly my life seemed to get better.
Funny isn't it, how where you put your attention can impact how you feel. It's almost like what you do with your time and your mind will directly result in how you feel about yourself and your life... No WAY!
Shake it out, bitches. How do you really expect to dance with the devil on your back?
Do you think, if every day I made a quiet prayer to the Universe, to the ether, to my own soul, that I could acquire grace (because let's face it - I'm a Whirling Dervish of ridiculous)? Do you think if I prayed for it that I might one day be graceful in everything that I said or did?
I guess we'll just have to see.
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